One of my favorite therapeutic tools is to teach couples reflective listening. When used well, it has the power to break through an argument that has reached an impasse; uncover deep vulnerable feelings; and break the cycle of those same arguments you have all the time.
Reflective listening is slow, methodical. It is the antithesis of a heated, fast-moving argument. The rhythm of reflective listening causes us to slow down, breathe, listen... and then validate. The heart of