I Pursue... You Withdraw... Now What?

How do we manage conflict where one spouse is a talker and the other processes internally? Often when this situation exists in a relationship, a dynamic can result where one spouse becomes a pursuer and the other becomes and distancer or withdrawer. This can present all kinds of problems when conflict arises that would really benefit from conversation and working things through together. There are many strategies and models out there for handling these style differences. I would recommend that regardless of the strategy used, a helpful guiding principle would be to create space that is safe for both people to show up and feel validation exactly how they are. Rather than trying to extract wha

Resources for Mixed-Sexuality Relationships

As a white, straight, cisgender male studying sexual and gender minorities, I am constantly discovering my blind spots. In my attempts to accurately represent the populations I study I constantly seek out people who hold the identities of those I serve and study. These friends and acquaintances act as invaluable resources, guiding me as a researcher and clinician. I share this to position myself and make my own limitations as transparent as possible. Recently my professional focus has turned me towards mixed-sexuality relationships where partners come from conservative religious backgrounds. It has been estimated that up to 2 million (likely more now) lesbian, gay and bisexual individuals ha

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