Exploring what Allows You, Your Spouse and Your Relationship to Spiritually Thrive

I often have the opportunity to work with clients who consider themselves to be in a mixed-faith marriage. The following blog discusses one of the thought exercises I have found helpful in supporting clients in exploring and honoring their and their partner's unique spiritual needs. The word "spiritual" can be triggering for some individuals who have experienced a faith crisis and/or faith transition. I intend to use the word spiritual utilizing the following definition of spirituality as described by Brenè Brown, but allow yourself to use your own definition and meaning of spirituality as appropriate: “Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to eac

Tips for Mixed-Faith Marriages: You Both Have a Right to Parent your Child(ren) Part 2

continued.... e) Make sure you are both a “spiritual” and a “secular” leader in your home. Too often I see dynamics where the believing spouse now runs all of the religious traditions, family prayers, scripture studies, etc. while the transitioner focuses on all things science and historical. Figure out ways to expand the concept of educational and spiritual opportunities within your home. Transitioning parents are moral, ethical beings with lots of potential to bring new perspectives. Believing parents are educated, complex beings that are not just defined by their religious beliefs. For example, I know of parents where they switch between traditional prayers and parent-led meditations. I k

Tips for Mixed-Faith Marriages: You Both Have a Right to Parent your Child(ren) Part 1

The third tip I offer is: You both have a right to parent your children through and after a faith transition. How? a. Educate yourself and get professional help when needed. Although marriage is ideally focused on teamwork and partnership, nothing can bring out the claws faster than issues that trigger our inner mama or papa bear instincts. Feeling upset, defensive and protective when in conflict with your partner in regards to your kids is a fairly normal phenomenon. But “normal” doesn’t necessarily mean "okay" or beneficial. Unfortunately the statistics show that parenting disputes play a major role in many divorces. Ironically, most of us still have to find ways to co-parent post-divorce.

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